Oh how I Dread-mill..

“27 degrees at 6 am. Turn that alarm off”, I thought!

“Oh yeah, its treadmill day…maybe a 27 degree trail run would be better..”

It was my off season, up until a few days ago when I signed up to The Thomas Jefferson 100k in March, which means training is back on, and training means getting back on the dreadmill, er the treadmill and doing some hill running.

BIG sigh!

The look on my dog’s face made it even worse, “no fun trail run for me?! How could you, you don’t need to go run in that little room on that boring man made running-thing…take me outside instead, you hamster!”  His eyes seemed to plead, with just an edge of disgust curling his lip.

Its 3 miles to the gym, I figured a few miles in the fresh air would get me ready for what lay ahead.  A friend offered to let me borrow his code to get into his apartment’s gym, and rather than go to mine, I thought I would go there for a change.

Into his apartment complex, “wait a minute, I don’t actually know where his gym is.  Play it cool, act like you know where you are going.”
“Ah ha! There it is…I’ll just run till someone else shows up, I don’t want to take up someone elses time.”
Not a soul was in the gym, the lights weren’t even on.

With a big sigh I stepped onto the belt. “Ok, here we go.”

Minute 0-5.  “I think im gonna walk to warm up, that run wasn’t really a warm up, right?” I got the treadmill up to 15% and started the hike.  “This isn’t bad, piece of cake, lets crank this baby up!”

5-15  Ok, time to run, well really jog, slowly, very slowly.  “Maybe I should shut the shades so people can’t see how pathetically slow I am!”

15-20 Oh good! YAY! walk time again…phew.  Don’t be a wimp, this is a hike not a leisurely walk uphill..focus, focus!

20-30 Grr back to that jog..actually I’m getting a bit of that runner’s high, or maybe its just lack of oxygen..?!

30-35 Oh my gosh, walking never felt so good..walk. walk, walk, walk…My friend walks in after his long run in the woods, I ask him to stand in front of me so I can see him, (and not fall off the side of the treadmill trying to look at him sideways.)  He has had a nice run at Umstead and just finished breakfast out..(Jerk, don’t talk about food while I am on this torture device.)  He smirks, and announces that he’s heading home and tell me to enjoy!  (Enjoy?!  I can see that smirk, I know he knows that I know that we both know it sucks…sorry lack of oxygen there, was that confusing?)

35-45 Well I lost that runner’s high. Help! Dig deep, com’on, you can do it, you are not out of shape! (Or maybe you are.)  Get that finger away from the emergency stop button, cheating will get you nowhere!

45-50..last walk, enjoy it! (how am I so wet? I never sweat this much)..oh, look at that water cooler over there, I bet the water is cold and refreshing…oops…time’s up run again.

50-60 Lead legs, gasp, gasp, gasp…look away from that water cooler…do NOT touch that emergency stop button. Is this what a heart attack feels like? Am I dying or just bonking, getting tunnel vision.  Someone please come into the gym and want to use the treadmill, then I would HAVE to get off. You know what would be really good right now, watermelon, watermelon and that gross sugary purple gatoraide…and a baked potato with lots of salt..and chocolate. why am ! craving chocolate on this thing?

60 woohoo!! (oh geeze, and now I have 3 miles to run home…facepalm)

And done, until NEXT WEEK?



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